The Pegasus Awards

Never Set the Cat on Fire

Frank Hayes

Pegasus Award

Award Year Category
2005 Best Classic Filk Song

Pegasus Nominations

Year Category
2004 Best Classic Filk Song
1999 Best Fool Song
 

Never Set the Cat on Fire

Copyright © by Frank Hayes, Firebird Arts & Music (BMI)
Used by Permission

Never set the cat on fire, you only will annoy it
The heat will make the beast perspire; she surely won't enjoy it
Likewise do not ignite the dog, the snake, the gerbil, or the frog
No, never set the cat on fire

Refrain
And mind your manners, as circumstances may require
And never set the cat on fire

Don't open up the cabin hatch; the air is sure to leave it
And air is very hard to catch; you never will retrieve it
And though you think your life's a bore, don't open the reactor door
Don't open up the cabin hatch

Refrain

Don't change the navigator's data, someone's sure to see ya
You know the captain's view of that, a very bad idea
He doesn't want his ship to race forever lost in endless space
Don't change the navigator's data

Refrain

Don't start an interstellar war; it has no helpful uses
When someone asks you 'what's it for?', you'll only make excuses
If thirty trillion folks get hurt, you'll go to bed with no dessert!
Don't start an interstellar war

Refrain twice

 

 
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