I'm proud of what I do, I couldn't love it more With Army Air Corps Maintenance, I help to win the war My heart swells as my bombers go engage the enemy But now that one just fell apart, all fingers point at me For I'm the man who walked the wing, inspecting every weld And tightening those bolts right there that, dammit, should have held I still can't puzzle out just what I did that wasn't right But who's that small, green figure at the corner of my sight? I haven't slept in days, the problem's getting worse The generals and pilots both use my name as a curse The prop that flew off on its own was bad beyond belief But now I've found a fuel tank that's been filled with creamed chipped beef And I'm the man who's on the spot, I'm facing certain doom They won't accept excuses, planes don't just "fall down, go boom!" And now I hear that droll and nasal voice I've learned to dread It means I'll see that midget with the helmet on his head I might as well give up, I can't escape my fate Hey, maybe if I tell the truth, I'll get a Section Eight I'm sure I've lost my sanity, my eyes are playing tricks I swear a plane just took off with a rabbit at the stick Now I'm the man who's in the brig, the court martial's today But surely, since I'm innocent, it won't be me who'll pay I know they'll treat me fairly, and . . . oh, wait, what does it mean When I walk into the courtroom, and my lawyer's short and green?